A poem by Joelsays

JAMB HEIGHT

In sixteen years I should be done with school, serve in the seventeenth year, get a job in the eighteenth year, buy a house in the nineteenth year, get married in the twentieth year and become a millionaire in the twenty-sixth year… This was my dream… My dream to be an accountant.
So I began chasing this dream recklessly until I was involved in an accident… Yes! I was JAMBed, hospitalized, depressed, motivated, re-energised and on the road again but again the same accident…

All the dreams and aspirations become dim lit as the pop-up on the computer screen says “No admission given yet”. Dreams I used to chase have grown wings and now chase me causing nightmares that gives insomnia.
I will burn candles, sleep less trying to manoeuvre this accident, maybe if I look left and right, read what’s left and write the rest because these dreams are locked up in the exam body, I stopped chasing dreams and started chasing scores, years of uninteresting activities that don’t contribute to creativity… Little why its called THE EXAMINATION BOARD(bored)

So more years down the line, I’ve realized that the road cannot be crossed by me, hope lost, heart bent, head bowed, soul choked, paper stained from the blood seeping out of my wrist as I write, I tried the easy way out, an act only a crime when attempted and not when committed…

So mother I write facing this computer expecting another accident, I am sorry I could not fulfil the promises I made when I finished secondary school, I am sorry for the tears you’d cry when I am gone
I am sorry for my smiling face in your mind when you mourn
I am sorry for times you’d wish it’s all a dream
I am sorry for times when you’d in your prayers scream
I am sorry for the nine months, I wish I was still birth

I will say more but this book is drenched in blood and I feel dizzy
I am still checking but it says ‘server busy’
Now the page is loading but its like the clouds are fading and my breath is fainting.
The screen just popped up… “You have been given provisional admission into……”